Learn to Program with Asher @ FurDev

Welcome to Programming with Asher!

Come on in! Wow, I'm glad you're here 'cause it's always nice getting visitors. Well, I'm Asher and this is my humble abode of programming magic, and life appreciation. I assume you've stopped by to start your journey towards computer wizardry, as my grandma likes to call it, so I'll just get right to it. To the right you'll see the navigation menu, from there you should be able to get to the rest of the site. Below is the latest news in blog form about all sorts of things!

Anyways, I'm not kicking you out or anything, in fact stay as long as you want (I can stay up all night, don't worry - wait, no I can't), buuuut... I don't have too much more to say here for now. So... nice meeting you, and goodbye!

"Beauty is the purgation of the superfluous." ~ Michelangelo

Sincerely, your friend,

Asher

For More Information: The Introductory Post

7th Grade English Journal Entry 39

This entry is part 39 of 39 in the series 7th Grade English Writing Journal

This is an excerpt from my 7th grade English journal. I’ll have more excerpts released on the approximate dates they were written transposed to the 2012 school year. I actually won an award at my school for having the most creative journal in class. Without further ado here is today’s entry:

Approx. 05/21/96

Dear,

Well first I would choose Bunga-Bunga soup because the little elven aliens convinced me, through hypnotism, that those squishy eyeballs are pretty good. Then I would choose the stuffed piece of kool-aid because in zero-gravity, I’m on a spaceship disguised as a forest, they would be pretty fun. Then I would take my purple cats because munching on those little whiskers fresh from that little saber toothed face is the best thing someone can do.


Stay tuned for more, sincerely,

Ashe

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Old Poetry: Friends Are Stronger

This entry is part 78 of 78 in the series Old Poetry

As I wrote before, this is one in a series of poems spanning several years. Some of these aren’t my best writing (I wrote some of them ten years ago), and some are just too angsty, but here they are.

© 2005 Asher H.

Someday,

People will be saying my name,

Do you believe it?

A lot of people,

I will have myriads of enemies,

And that’s okay,

Because my friends are stronger.


Thanks for reading!

Sincerely,

Asher

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7th Grade English Journal Entry 38

This entry is part 38 of 39 in the series 7th Grade English Writing Journal

This is an excerpt from my 7th grade English journal. I’ll have more excerpts released on the approximate dates they were written transposed to the 2012 school year. I actually won an award at my school for having the most creative journal in class. Without further ado here is today’s entry:

Approx. 05/14/96

Dear,

I rate it a 10 – I saw some pretty interesting stuff on my break. I saw a gas station with pumps that gave cash or credit, unleaded plus, and the hottest thing going. I saw my Dad build a gun with what he found under his chair while singing Pearl Jam songs. I rode in a death vehicle for 10 hours while listening to Tom Petty songs just to see a computer get the demon exorcised out of it. The driver almost went insane because someone ate all the good burgers at South West Plaza. My birthday is next birthday, so I’m still pretty happy.


Stay tuned for more, sincerely,

Asher

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Old Poetry: From Wished For Beginnings

This entry is part 77 of 78 in the series Old Poetry

As I wrote before, this is one in a series of poems spanning several years. Some of these aren’t my best writing (I wrote some of them ten years ago), and some are just too angsty, but here they are.

© 2005 Asher H.

From wished for beginnings,

To cadenced conclusions,

My feelings tempestuous,

With clouds slowly traveling,

I cry internal tears,

Over knowing what I must know,

Was it better to be in the dark?

What light is there at the end of tunnels,

When the tunnel is your own mind?


Thanks for reading!

Sincerely,

Asher

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7th Grade English Journal Entry 37

This entry is part 37 of 39 in the series 7th Grade English Writing Journal

This is an excerpt from my 7th grade English journal. I’ll have more excerpts released on the approximate dates they were written transposed to the 2012 school year. I actually won an award at my school for having the most creative journal in class. Without further ado here is today’s entry:

Approx. 05/07/96

Dear,

The perfect vacation spot would have to be on planet 22. All those little 22tians would fan me and let me watch Oprah Galactica 7 days a week. I wouldn’t have to do any chores like hauling wood and chopping water. I would get visited by the head queen muna-bunga and she would shower me with gifts and compliments. I would open m presents and little penguins would jump out. Fresh Aire music would start up, preferably Saving the Wildlife. Then a bunch of robotic elves would come out and say, “Stop making a mess!” Then I would wake up from my daydream and be back in English class. Crap!


Stay tuned for more, sincerely,

Asher

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Archives: Journal Entry circa 11/13/00

Taken from junior year AP Literature and Composition notes.  I was a crazy person.  That’s all I can say.

Asher –

Journal Topic:  11/13/00  How do you tell truth from trend?

Truth is absolute, a tend is not absolute.  For instance the sky is blue is a truth, while capital punishment is a trend.  Now some argue that through a relativistic view of reality, that one view that says your pereptual is determined by a belief effected by everyone’s belief, that reality is fluid but kept static through the beliefs of the masses, that truth is not absolute and only decided upon.  Well, that is wrong.  In and of itself it is holding some assumptions of reality that are considered true to that view, truths that would remain absolute regardless of views.  They are few and they are powerful.  Trend is but a wave upon the ocean of eternal truth, it rolls pas and eventually crashes against the shore, while the body of water still remains.  Winston Smith knew truth, but in his world you couldn’t see the ocean under the waves.  Big Brother was trend, everything and anything of the now was absolute in past, present, and future.  Trush is an assumption you can’t discard, you can look at it a million different was perhaps, but it itself is indeispensable.  In this way truth is the mirror on a telescope, trend is what lense you’re using.  Now some can say trned is truth, but they are also wrong, for what is truth if it is not always truth?  Truth is absolute, trend is superfluous.

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Archives: Journal Entry circa 11/15/00

I wrote these entries when I was studying 1984 in AP Composition and Literature. I was a junior in high school and I was f*cking insane. So, here they are for my own benefit:

Journal: 11/14/00

I. What is the Nature of and What Are the functions of Literature?

The nature of literature is that of the world. Physically it is the ink printed in symbols upon a woven parchment, but it is this very fact that leads to such depths of the universe. The symbols themselves are a whole other story, but suffice it to say that they are powerful in their woring for they define, when followed, what can be said. So, in essence, the nature of literature is communication. And not necessarily communication of what already exists, because the beauty of it is you can communicate what hasn’t existed before.

So the essence of literature najes yo not only is composition but is also the function. It’s written and read to convery some kind of message. But it’s also a different kind of message in a class of it’s own for when you say something it is not recorded. Without aid you cannot go back and prove you said anything. With writing it is, or at least should be, a record, with it is evidence of time. It’s message is contained in and can endure in its tome encasing. The question is, are we going to let it?

II. What is the nature of the subject?

The subject is that which is converyed. There are an infinite number of subjects…

Journal: 11/15/00

Can my journal entries not necessarily be in chronological order. Like this one on the back of this page? In fact, can my journal be typed up on the computer? That might, in fact, be easier for me, and probably you in the long run. I can type much faster on the computer than write, like what I’ve written so far, I would have been done at least a dozen seconds ago. Either way, to get to more important things, did you pick up on a very foreshadowing, profound, “doublethink” (double meaning :-) ) statement in the book? In chapter II, just when they are reflecting that they are the dead after they have successfully procured the book they are caught by a telescreen behind the painting. Earlier in that chapter Julia had looked at that picture and remarked, “I bet this has bugs behind it, … I’ll clean it someday.” Lo and behold there was a “bug” behind it, but what could Orwell, in that foreshadowing, when she also said, “I’ll clean it someday.” mean? Here you have this promiscuous rebel of the Junior Anti-Sex League, who with one characteristic movement of the arm can rip off her clothes as if she were destroying or altering an entire civilization, telling Winston she’ll clean the bug behind the picture, the bug of Big Brother. Is she to cleanse the entire orthodoxy? And if so in what, the good ‘corruption’ of the individual taking pleasure in love and sex, not worrying in fake details of politics and how she’s being robbed everyday of her fullest potential? In the slogans of the Party that she perfectly hid behind? In the same minded wickedness that one rebel force counteracts another wearing a sash around the waist? Vitriol in a child’s face?

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Old Poetry: Genera-lyrical

This entry is part 76 of 78 in the series Old Poetry

As I wrote before, this is one in a series of poems spanning several years. Some of these aren’t my best writing (I wrote some of them ten years ago), and some are just too angsty, but here they are.

© 2005 Asher H.

Generalizations exclusively categoric periodicals

Grasp grasp grasp that which you can hold hold scold

Hot! Standing screaming being throughout proceeding

Pop! Balancing act one of two of masquerading vampires

Life ticks clocks tock keys turn unlock everywhere caught

Money walks with compassionate potential in your hands

Stretch reach conceive towards stars wet with tears

Collect connect forget regret today is now is today

Last moments last thoughts last words last kiss

Reminisce todays bliss before you fist yourself without

Who cares to love when its so hard to miss

Memorial stabbings find themselves linked to families

Tight hold tight don’t forget don’t lose grip

Life is all you get life is all you remit

For whom the world tolls begone tomorrow

Periodic categorical exlu-civic genera-lyrical.


Thanks for reading!

Sincerely,

Asher

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Archives: Journal Entry circa 2000

I think I wrote this journal when I was studying the book 1984.  It’s really… bizarre, and not very well written.  I wrote it when I was nuts.  Literally.  So, keep that in mind.

Archived Journal Entry

Journal Entry -  The world is a cube, and I’m a globe inside it.  Sets of connotations, as a set of defenitions pass by, as a seven-eleven passes by, as Charles Manson passes by… by george, George, everything just passes me by!  My life passes by, my time passes by, my beliefs eventually pass me by…  Why, I’m the center of the world!  Here it is now, in the center, I control everythin, well, it’s fun, and, um, there’s nothing to do, and well, I’m getting bored, so me with my ultimate power make myself not have ultimate power and now no one has the power.  No one has the power and the glory, forever and ever and ever.  No one has the power and the glory, forever, and ever, and ever.  No one has the power and the glory, forever, and ever, and ever…  No one has the power!  No one has the glory!  No one has the power!  No one has the glory!  Hey hey hey…  oh sorry, just an old song I used to know, it was from No One Superstar.  I wonder if I understand what I’m talking about, I wonder if Winston understands what he’s talking about…  Poor old Winston, he finally loved Big Brother, oh how shocking, I never saw that one coming…  no surprises, contrived from birth ‘til death.  Which reminds me, how the proletarians are at one point in the novel compared to ants.  At least one of them is.  And I wonder what the significance of the occurring red of their forearms.  Soviet Flag?  Blood?  Or just a red forearm?  THere really wasn’t any mention of any other colors except gray swirls of dust other than Black, White, and Red.  The book was very straight forward, not a very high reading grade level seemed required, but heck, that doesn’t necessarily mean anything.  Bathrooms, now that’s where great literature is born.  Some guy sitting on the toilet, pondering, pondering.  Alot of things gets done in the bathroom.  I fell asleep in the bathroom today, so I wasn’t thinking.  But you never know when you’ll just look at the pattern on the bathroom floor and begin to reconstruct Pascals triangle from nothingness.  Bresenhams line theorem, that’s what this here free-writing needs, a good Bresenham Line Algorithm.  Algorithms for everything are my self-delusion.  I’m not really focusing on anything, but I guess that’s why they call it deluded.  Anywho…  I still wonder what that cartoon is!  With the raccoon and the vent nose millionaire and all that.  You know what sets me and the world apart?  I can never truly put my finger on it.  First off it’s not necessarily the whole world, there are others out there like me, but I just haven’t found the right one.  What sets me apart from most is a special element of which I have no name.  At times my emotions tell me I could open my mouth and out would come forth a tale or paragraph or sentence that would just explain everything… about my soul, about the world, about the overpowering feeling of eternal beauty.  Sometimes, in cycles, I think I could write and draw it all down on a page, but that only produces small fragments compared to the bigger picture.  I slowly am realizing that this beauty is contained, contained in experience yet to be, but that is what paints the ever saddening, ever darkening picture, that one, or no one with his power and glory, doesn’t quite rise to the challenge to understand.. me.  To know me is to love me.

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Archives: 1984 Research Rough Draft circa 11/16/00

Asher —
Period 7
11/16/00
Research Rough Draft
Introduction/Abstract:

George Orwell toys with the issue of morality in his novel 1984 and in his toying implies the question of a “moral choice” (Reilly 63) : what to choose as our future. The answering of this question involves more than issues of “good” or “bad” ideologies, but a working definition for amoralistic values. The broadening of vision to look beyond what is good or bad may help the contemporary individual to decide on the “best” ideology without the preconception of its merits.

Critical Review

1984 depicts a bleak nightmare future that has so ingrained itself upon the minds of today that many ideas of dystopias with much the same style are deemed ‘Orwellian’. One could say this novel has had continuing impact on the world culture from the time it was written to well beyond the year it was meant to depict. The dystopia that the novel depicts inherently brings to mind various questions and interpretations.

Orwell is quoted that 1984’s purpose was to show “…that totalitarian ideas have taken root in the minds of intellectuals everywhere…” and “…to draw these ideas out to their logical consequences.” (Orwell 29) Contemporaries of the time criticized 1984 as an inaccurate attack on the movement of the British Labour Party and Socialism in general, and Orwell had responded. Orwell shows in his novel the totalitarian state of Oceania and its effect on a single man representing all men. His response helps open the door for many other interpretations once those details of the author’s intent were laid out.
The novel has been viewed historically in two contexts: its criticism of Stalinism, and its prophecies of current sociological trends. Orwell has been noted as wanting his novel read with a Leftist’s interests in mind as an attack on Totalitarianism or more specifically Stalinism. The imagery is quite strong: Big Brother’s image is modeled on Stalin and Emmanuel Goldstein’s on Trotsky. However, this is also a trend to view the novel as a prophecy of current sociological trends such as television, censorship, and consumerism of the proletarians. (Kellner 2000)

Politically the novel has been used for various ends. One major end is the use of the book as a tool in the attack of socialism by the Right. They are often led to believe that the Totalitarianism in the book is equal to socialism as a whole, even though the book more accurately depicts Stalinism and not necessarily Democratic Socialism. (Kellner 2000) Another major end is the idea that the book is a criticism of the democratic system of government using the theory that the flaws inherent in democracy may be the origin or roots of the societies that reigned in the novel. Flaws in the democratic system include the use of government to advance personal interests, etc. (Larson 2000)

Rationale

A moral criticism combined with a structuralist perspective is, perhaps, one of the best ways to view Orwell’s 1984. A moral criticism would examine the ideas of “good” and “evil” and how they apply to the book. It would explore various facets of morality such as where does it show morality to exist in the novel, or what is considered moral in the story. Through the structuralist approach one can appreciate Orwell’s construction of symbols and occurrences which lead to reversals of roles between good and evil. Also structuralism addresses, or more accurately, uses handed down or “a priori” assumptions about the possible meaning or symbolism of various parts of a story. This enables the structuralist to have a starting place in the exploration of the construction of the novel’s meaning through its various parts. The structuralist approach is often concerned with binary aspects of subjects present in literature such as realism versus romanticism, light versus dark, and good versus evil. In 1984 there are looming examples of black versus white, and the idea of good versus evil.

Discussion

These constructions inevitably lead to the consideration of good and evil. We enter into the idea of morality as being either true or relativistic, and if it is relativistic then perhaps there is truly no morality at all in some situations. Using 1984 as a reference, one may be lead to believe a relativistic view of good and evil, and that embracing the good stated by everyone else is to be virtuous, but that would be to go with the teachings contained in the book for the book. If you remove yourself or take one step back from that, and through inference perhaps see that the book was written to show that the “moral” sides of good and evil in debate, especially debate about policy and truth do not necessarily exist or have meaning. Winston never actually calls the changing of the past or the swallowing of the lies evil, but his memory and his mind still want to endure. One of the largest elements of the nightmare future presented in Orwell’s 1984 is the representation of good and evil, or in essence, the nonrepresentation of good and evil. How does the morality of a man reflect his actions, purpose, and goal that he is striving for? It could be possible that amorality may be a more accurate description to two sides of a movement. A moral criticism would examine how crime is defined and handled in the novel. There is no written crime in the novel, crime is simply what goes against the party’s will. Furthermore proletariates seem to be able to commit no crimes. Clearly this is a sign of amorality readily present in the novel. Winston makes a couple mentions to it himself, such as when he ponders about the diary and sexual relations.
The biggest structural example of this stance of amorality is in the ideological combat between O’Brien and Winston when he asks Winston in torture and rehabilitation if he thought he was superior to him. Winston said he was, but then O’Brien played back the tape of him saying all the nasty things he’d do for The Brotherhood, and it was of the same despicable nature as that supposed of the party. This refutation on O’Briens was extremely successful and logical because The Brotherhood is supposed to be the “good” and morally upright side, both to the reader and to Winston. Both sides, the counter-revolutionary and the revolutionary seemed to have the same morals, or in a better word, amorality. This created a society where there were no said rules, but the rules that were to be followed were the rules of those in power.

Another interesting structural example is the play Orwell makes of the use of black and white. Emmanuel Goldstein, from our point of view is good in this strange society, and likewise he is associated with white, religion, sacredness (the aureole of white hair around his head), judaism, and even a sheep. I thought this was a particularly strong case of symbolism, where Goldstein obviously symbolizes some form of godly purity and good. The motif of the party seems to be black: the black mustache on the posters of Big Brother, the black suits, eyes, hair, eyebrows, instruments that the party members throughout the book use or bear (except for the instruments of the torture assistant, his are white). This seeming reversal of the good and evil roles in relation to color, where black is usually evil and white is usually good, seems to be a purposeful motif that what seems good or IS good is only so because of decision or because of force.

This leads one to then morally question the book itself, or perhaps let the book question you. Orwell very well may have meant 1984 to be a prophecy, and indeed has been quoted on saying that 1984 is a book about the consequences of current ideas of his fellow “intellectual” carried out without interruption. (Orwell 30) The title of the book was set in the far future, in 1984, so as to symbolize what could come. So then the book presents to us a question: what to choose as our future?

If amorality is present in both sides of a supposed argument, then the moral choice cannot be made, for there would be no morality. Are we really moral to suppose that the way things are now, with individuality and democracy, is the moral choice? More likely the constant is not a question of morality but rather a question of tradition or history. Using history as a tool, Orwell has plotted out the logical consequences of totalitarian thinking that was seemingly common among his intellectual peers at the time. The question of morality was left behind, and is often interpreted as being left up to the reader. However, with these arguments about good and evil present in the book as a larger meaning, in terms of details devoted to it, how can a reader make a “moral choice”?

When we talk about morality we are also implying the discussion of the alleged existence of the spirit of man. Historically through religion the spirit of man has been defined and redefined as the core of a man: his mind, his body, and his soul. All morality, immorality, and amorality stem from human interactions and the human mind, essentially the human spirit. However, if we assume there is an inherently good spirit of man than all men should be inherently good, a vice versa for an evil spirit. Again the black and white versions of good and evil seem to fade with the realization that the human spirit is capable of both. Winston seems to be searching throughout the book for some kind of identity by using the past as a guide to his present self. He has recurring flashbacks of various situations: his mother, his sister, and the raid shelter. Winston’s search for the self, and in essence for his mind and individuality, is his search for the human ‘spirit’. The party has allegedly disposed of his spirit, so without spirit perhaps ‘black and white’ cannot even be committed?

In effect, good and evil aren’t necessarily absolute nor “a priori” assumptions when two different ideologies clash, both ideologies in effect may be righteous in the moral sense, but are they right? The tradition of capitalism and individuality, where each individual supposedly gets what his work is worth, and where an educated populous can supposedly bring about righteousness in business by demanding quality of product by force of capital, is what the American populous is used to. One could argue that because they are used to this, and that this way of life has prevailed, that they believe it morally right because they have been taught it so. Likewise in the state of Oceania the party rewrites history to its own means, vaporizes people to its own desires, and is believed to be morally righteous because it has been taught so and because it is tradition by force. But which is morally “right”? With the idea that there is amorality on both sides of a movement comes also the idea that there is no proper moral “right” and “wrong” that applies to both.

We have come to the idea of the self versus the society. Some beliefs seem to be inherent in just the existence of a being, such that if they are murdered it would be bad, so if any others are murdered that would also be bad. Are these moral? Perhaps the invention of Newspeak in the novel is present to illustrate what we may be traveling towards: perhaps the word “moral” really is so broad it has very little meaning at all but eliminates other more precise definitions of morality. This is exactly one of the ways Newspeak is used in the book to eliminate words and thus to eliminate the capability of clear thought. In order to make a moral choice one has to already have a moral base, or in effect moral assumptions. If these are established then one can make decisions based on that system of morality, and in definition those choices would be moral.

1984 seems to have been written to address the question of a making a “moral choice” about the future as it readily scares the reader into trying to take a stance on morality, or even question what the truth of morality is! Such as when O’Brien tortures Winston and tells him that all reality is relative, that he could float off the ground if the party willed it, but it’s because Winston is insane that he cannot understand that. O’Brien eventually gets Winston to believe that two plus two equals five if the party would wish it so. When affronted with this relativistic view as we form a reaction to the statements of the novel, and O’Brien, we are force to examine what are moral truth is. Is it objective reality or is reality formed by us alone? This is a fundamental question that must be answered by the individual alone, that is what is used as a basis for the impact of the story. When the question of relativistic reality and objective reality comes into play between O’Brien and Winston, Orwell is basically showing us the logical conclusions of each train of thought.

Conclusion

In the novel totalitarian relativism wins in the end, as Winston either chooses the party or death by rat burrowing. However, as the novel ends with the new Winston playing with the chess pieces in the café we must ask ourselves who do we want to win? That is when the moral choice must be made. If we look around us today, post-1984, what do we see as our future, and what do we want to choose as our future? Neither socialism, capitalism, nor totalitarianism may be our ideological futures as they only represent factions of ideology. These factions may not be right nor wrong, neither “good” nor “bad”, so it is up to you to decide what you believe the moral choice is and make it.

Bibliography:

Reilly, Patrick. “Ninteteen-Eighty Four and Moral Choice.” Bloom’s Reviews: Comprehensive Research & Study Guides – George Orwell’s Nineteen Eighty-Four. Ed. Harold Bloom. Broomall: Chelsea House Publishers. 1986. 63 – 65.

Orwell, George. “On the Thrust of His Novel.” Bloom’s Reviews: Comprehensive Research & Study Guides – George Orwell’s Nineteen Eighty-Four. Ed. Harold Bloom. Broomall: Chelsea House Publishers. 1998. 29 – 30.

Kellner, Douglas. “From 1984 to One-Dimensional Man: Critical Reflections on Orwell and Marcuse.” Unknown revision.
http://www.uta.edu/huma/illuminations/kell13.htm (12 Dec. 2000)

Larson, Ronald. “Orwell’s 1984 – and Where We Stand.” 1984.
http://www.libertyhaven.com/noneoftheabove/fictionmusicorentertainment/orwellsstand.html (12 Dec. 2000)

More…

I am studying 1984 from a structuralist perspective because I want to find out how the morality of man reflects the actions, purpose and goal that he is striving for in order to show the possibility of immorality on both sides of a movement so that one can justly infer that there aren’t necessarily sides of good and evil as constants.

The biggest example of this stance of no concern of morality in issues of ideology combat is when O’Brien asks Winston in torture and rehabilitation if he thought he was superior to him. Winston said he though he was, but then O’Brien played back the tape of him saying all the nasty things he’d do for the brotherhood, and they were the same that he would or was supposed to do for the party. This refutation on O’Briens was extremely successfull and logical on that detail. Both sides, the counter-revolutionary and the revolutionary seemed to have the same morals, or in better words lack of concern about morals at all. This created a society where there were no said rules, but the rules that were to be followed were the rules of those in power.

Another interesting example is the play Orwell makes of the use of black and white. Emmanuel Goldstein, form our point of view is good in this strange society, and likewise he is associated with white, religion, sacredness (the aureole), judaism, and even a sheep. I thought this was a particularly strong case of symbolism. Everything that seems to have to do with the party, which is in effect good, while Emmanuel is bad, is black: the black moustache on the posters of Big Brother, the black suits, eyes, hair, eyebrows, instruments that the party members throughout the book use or bear. This seeming reversal of the good and evil roles in relation to color seems to a purposeful expression that what seems good or IS good is only so because of decision or because of force. I could also go on about how the number three is used repeatedly throughout, and the number four which could represent the cross or goodness but I’m still debating whether that is in the scope of this paper.

Using 1984 as a reference, one may be lead to believe a relativistic view of good and evil, and that embracing the good stated by everyone else is to be virtuous, but that would be to go with the teachings contained in the book for the book. If you remove yourself or step one step back from that, I infer that the book was written to show that the “moral” sides of good and evil in debate, especially debate about policy and truth do not necessarily exist or have meaning. Winston never actually calls the changing of the past or the swallowing of the lies evil, but his memory and his mind still want to endure. I’m also debating that somehow the assumption of the existence of the spirit of man plays into this whole thing, but I can’t figure that one out yet.

In effect, good and evil aren’t necessarily premade assumptions when two different ideologies clash, both idologies in effect may be righteous in the moral sense, but are they right?

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On Being Different – Scene 5

This entry is part 5 of 22 in the series On Being Different

I wrote a play a long time ago called On Being Different.  I wrote it in high school, so to be honest, it’s not very good.  It has good parts, potentially good parts, and some pretty awful parts.  Seeing as how I use this journal for both tutorials and to chronicle my life, past and future, I thought I’d post it here for my own reference:

Scene 5 - Julia And Axel’s Entrance

[Scene fades back in.]

NARRATOR - I write and write and write but I don’t seem to have any substantial meaning yet. Did you know that one of the symptoms of schizophrenia is an excessive amount of writing with no meaning. Not to point that out to you guys, who’ve been dutifully sitting there soaking in whatever I have to offer. Perhaps you are starting to understand what I’m getting at, starting to comprehend my world, starting to delve into the rabbit hole. Come with me Alice, you can leave your twinkies behind for tea time, just come with me Alice and together we shall go down this dark and dank rabbit hole to a world filled with twisted truths of little girls eating mushrooms who grow bigger and bigger until they’re going to burst. Ah, my sweet, here’s one now.

[A teenage girl enters from the side and into the bedroom scene.]

NARRATOR - Meet Julia, and no she’s not related to Todd, but we’ll see about that. Julia has a very special friend, whom she’s looking for right now…

[The bedroom is neatly adorned and is very traditional. There is a chest in front of the bed, the bed is discreet with light pink pillows and perfectly white bedsheets. There is a window and outside the window all we can see is sky. There is also a door to a closet that is unopened.]

JULIA - Axel? [Moves around the room as if she was looking for something small, picks up various objects as if it would be under them.] Axel, where are you? You know you’re too good at these hiding games… [Pauses a moment.] If I were Axel, where would I hide? [Quickly darts to look under the bed.] Nope not there… Hmmm… [Stands back up and walks towards the chest] I wonder if he is in… here! [Lifts the chest open, all of a sudden out pops Axel. Axel is half human, half wolf. His top half is human, and his bottom half is like a Halloween costume of a walking and talking wolf complete with tail (whish is animated preferably). The fur on this part of his body is black.]

AXEL - Aha! [Springs out of the chest like a genie might.]

JULIA - [Frightened a little.] There you are! Why do you do that to me Axel?

AXEL - Cause it’s fun, what else is there for me to do anyways? [Looks down.]

JULIA - You know I have to go to school Axel, I have no control over that. And isn’t that what you’re always saying, don’t worry about that which you have no control over?

AXEL - Yeah, that’s what I say. [Continues looking down.] You wouldn’t imagine the amount of time I have all by myself around here! I’m half way through your Narnia collection, and I just started that three days ago! I agree they’re fascinating books, by such a fascinating author, have you seen the A&E Biography on C. S. Lewis? It was great, but oh yeah, sorry YOU were at SCHOOL!

JULIA - [Almost in tears.] What do you want me to do Axel? Do you want me to just drop my studies for somebody that nobody else can see? Then you can kiss little Julia here goodbye, cause she’ll be carted off to a freakin’ mental hospital! I have to go to school Axel, that’s just the way it is, isn’t that just the way it is?

AXEL - [Complete change in attitude.] I’m sorry Jewel, I’m sorry. I didn’t mean it like that, I’m sorry. [She’s in tears now] I’m so sorry…

NARRATOR - And that my friends is Axel. Axel is a very special person, and what Julia doesn’t realize is that Axel is not a figment of her imagination, but rather something very different…

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7th Grade English Journal Entry 36

This entry is part 36 of 39 in the series 7th Grade English Writing Journal

This is an excerpt from my 7th grade English journal. I’ll have more excerpts released on the approximate dates they were written transposed to the 2012 school year. I actually won an award at my school for having the most creative journal in class. Without further ado here is today’s entry:

Approx. 04/30/96

Dear,

I would choose the body because if I chose the brain I’d jump up and down and sing the 12 days of Christmas. Then I would streak across the presiident’s lawn on a motorcycle, naked of course. Then that big monster Shneezel Shnorf would get me and drop me in the Atlantic ocean naked of course. I would freeze and freeze but I wouldn’t die, the coast guard would find me 5 days later and I would be on America’s most rescued. With fame and fortune I would start some organized crime, get caught by the F.B.I. and rot in a jailcell naked course.


Stay tuned for more, sincerely,

Asher

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Old Poetry: Humankind

This entry is part 75 of 78 in the series Old Poetry

As I wrote before, this is one in a series of poems spanning several years. Some of these aren’t my best writing (I wrote some of them ten years ago), and some are just too angsty, but here they are.

© 2005 Asher H.

We are not sacred

As risen from the earth

We are dust

To eventually return

Our only value

At any moment

Actualization

Of potential

To do, say, think, feel,

Nothing

Is to lie in a box hidden

Intruders cannot utillize

Even that left behind.

We are not coffins

Complete and of ourselves

We are souls of energy

Within eternal flux

With the potential

To love


Thanks for reading!

Sincerely,

Asher

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7th Grade English Journal Entry 35

This entry is part 35 of 39 in the series 7th Grade English Writing Journal

This is an excerpt from my 7th grade English journal. I’ll have more excerpts released on the approximate dates they were written transposed to the 2012 school year. I actually won an award at my school for having the most creative journal in class. Without further ado here is today’s entry:

Approx. 04/23/96

Dear,

If I had a choise I would be the moon. Then I could live a happy life with my friend Hubert the sun heating me. Then people could inhabit me and try to turn me into another earth. Actually I’ll guess I’ll be the sun. Then I could blink on and off and worry those inhabitants of earth about the sun going out.


Stay tuned for more, sincerely,

Ashe

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Old Poetry: If I Dream

This entry is part 74 of 78 in the series Old Poetry

As I wrote before, this is one in a series of poems spanning several years. Some of these aren’t my best writing (I wrote some of them ten years ago), and some are just too angsty, but here they are.

© 2005 Asher H.

You tell me to keep my feet on the ground
But you forget to mention, that at the same time
I need to dance on the highest cloud.

I try to become something bigger than who I am
Does your weak mind renounce that which I’m defining?
Wipe your cliches off your faceand witness
That reality is just the dream realm’s atlas.
No matter what concrete crevice you crawl into
The imagination of man is relentless.

It is relentless despite it’s wielders virtues
That is why you, the unsinging, the unpoetic,
The chastising, televised, cockeyed, lie
To excise my allies, to shut out advice
Because you cannot hear if you do not sing,
You cannot see if you do not paint,
You cannot sleep, perchance you dream.

What you fail to act upon is the knowledge
That your tired pipedream is my next light beam.
Your oppressive regime inspires my new scheme.
And everything mainstream, only enables me
To reign supreme.
So my daydreams, crossbeams, upstreams,
My spiritual steam
May worry you not.

But my dreams exercised will only have you caught
In a world of my own design, not yours
And you better hope you want what I want
Because my world doesn’t include the word war.
Dreamers are the architects and
Fashion designers of the world.
Breaking weak minds with agendas unfurled.
So go ahead, tell me I’m silly, irresponsible,
And worthless.

I’ll just keep on writing ignoring your grimace.
And continue to hope that if I act on these dreams
All the moving, and thinking, and shouting words torn
Will cause you to just stop, and not have to be anymore.


Thanks for reading!

Sincerely,

Asher

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